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Be Very Good or Very Bad

At May’s Athena Cappuccino Connections, Dr Martha Lee candidly shared her journey to become Singapore’s first and only clinical sexologist; and some of the common misconceptions which the title brings.

What do you do? What’s your weirdest client? How can you do that when you’re not married? Why do you do it? Are you a massage therapist?

These are some of the common questions Martha is faced with online, from strangers and from people on the street when they discover who she is and what she does.

The simple answer is that Dr Martha Lee helps people; and it is this driving force which makes her determined to continue and help more people. The fact that she is Singapore’s first (and currently only) clinical sexologist draws a lot of attention; sometimes unwanted, usually misguided.

Why Sexology?

Previously in the world of corporate communication, PR and marketing, Martha knew there had to be more to life so she moved into a non-profit role and started her own business.  She quickly realised that although she ultimately had to let go of the business because it wasn’t successful, she had some key skills which she was determined to put to good use, including demonstrating empathy and patience and being able to communicate well in difficult situations.

Around 2005, Martha also became anxious by the rising STI rates and teenage pregnancy statistics in Singapore and began to wonder why no one ever helped to promote a healthy and positive attitude to sex. It was at this point that Martha chose to study clinical sexology and travelled to the US to attain her doctorate.

The Vision of Eros…

Upon her return to Singapore, Martha already had a vision for her practice, Eros Coaching, and although she faced (and still faces) difficulty due to the nature of her profession she continues to raise awareness and provide help, guidance and support on sexual health issues.

Martha’s key takeaways:

Get Cleaner

  • Daily routine. Exercise, meditation, nutrition are all important aspects of having a clean and healthy mind (and body)
  • Make sure you look after yourself before anyone else; looking after yourself first means you are in a better position to help others

Get Clearer

  • Be clear about your ‘why’ – when you face obstacles you always need to fully understand why you are doing something; it can never only be about the money

Get Sharper

  • Focus on you and don’t worry about what others around you are doing
  • Martha might not always be the only sexologist in Singapore, but she is focussed on always being the best for her clients
  • Being sharp doesn’t mean having a big ego

About Martha Lee

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Dr. Martha Tara Lee is the first certified sexologist and internationally accredited sexuality educator in Singapore. Besides being founder and owner of four-year-old Eros Coaching, a sexuality and intimacy coaching company in Singapore, Martha has had careers in corporate communications, and in the non-profit sector. She will share in this session how she came to be a sexologist, how she deals with common misconceptions about her work as well as how she deal with the challenging people and situations she encounters.

Dr Martha Lee is Founder and Clinical Sexologist of Eros Coaching in Singapore. She is a certified sexuality educator with AASECT (American Association of Sexuality Educators, Counselors, and Therapists), as well as certified sexologist with ACS (American College of Sexologists). She holds a Doctorate in Human Sexuality from Institute for Advanced Study of Human Sexuality as well as certificates in practical counselling, life coaching and sex therapy. Often cited in the local media, Dr. Lee is the appointed sex expert for Men’s Health Singapore, Men’s Health Malaysia, Durex Singapore Facebook page as well as Durex Malaysia Facebook page. She has a weekly column with PublicHouse.sg and blogs for Good Vibrations Magazine. She was recognised as one of ‘Top 50 Inspiring Women under 40′ by Her World in July 2010, and one of ‘Top 100 Inspiring Women’ by CozyCot in March 2011.

Dr. Martha Lee, DHS, MA, BA
Clinical Sexologist
Eros Coaching Pte. Ltd.

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